I can't give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: try to please everybody all the time.

“Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.”

“My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income.”

“A marriage is always made up of two people who are prepared to swear that only the other one snores.”

“A joke’s a very serious thing.”

“You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don’t try.”

“He who receives a benefit should never forget it; he who bestow should never remember it.”

“When we do the best that we can, we never know what miracle is wrought in our life, or in the life of another.”

“An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile, hoping it will eat him last.”